My wife didn’t get part of this due to missing a certain Internet meme, so at the risk of over-explaining, here’s some links that prove I at least made an effort to be clever here:
Panel 1: Link
Panel 2: Link
Panel 3: Link
Programming a child’s vocabulary for my own amusement falls into the category of “stuff I would never do in real life but on some level wish I could for the humor value, so I’ll throw it in the strip.” The closest my wife and I have ever actually come to this is letting our son call his bellybutton a “buttum-buttum” for quite a while. We couldn’t bring ourselves to correct him because it was goddamned adorable.
…Okay, that and we sorta kinda taught him to sing “butt salve” to the theme song from the old Batman TV show, in honor of his diaper cream.
Anyway, we’re back on schedule, people! Sorry for the lapse, and see you on Tuesday!
-=ShoEboX=-
While watching a neighbor’s preschool kid we were looking through a guidebook on birds. We looked at all the common ones then came across a family of birds called Goatsuckers. I couldn’t help myself; just played it up. The parents came over later and asked about their little angel’s new word. Curiously, they never left him in our care again! Problem solved (ours not theirs)!
LOL! I’m old, 39, and I still got all of these references.
Oh, and I taught our twins to say “quadrapole magnet” at an early age. Does that count as a parlor trick? Maybe amongst High Energy Physicists….
Now I’ll be humming the “for porn” song all day. Thankyouverymuch.
I think you can do both! My kid is totally going to know all the songs from TV shows that aired before he was born.. and that.. is educational.. especially if it’s Animaniacs..
And I’ll stick DNA replication in there while I’m at it.
My Dad’s an electrical engineering professor, and assures me that I used to call oscilloscopes “ocoscopes.”‘
-=’Box=-
When my daughter was about 2 years old, we were in the grocery store going by the meat department. Looking over at a 3 foot long baloney sausage, I mentioned to my wife that in the Navy, they called that item ‘horse cock’. My daughter began yelling at the top of her lungs “HORSE COCK! HORSE COCK!”
Wow…something at some point got the commentary all screwed up…I just fixed it. Sorry if it looked weird when you got here earlier.
-=’Box=-
when I learning to talk, my dad was in graduate school. He and the other graduate students trained me to respond to the question “what are mitochondria for?” with “ATP!”.
Teach your kids everything you can. They’ll sort it all out by the time they’re 7. Kindergarten teachers, on the other hand, have no sense of humor.
My nephew couldn’t say “Dump Truck”. He left off the P and replaced the Tr with F.
We avoided construction sites and the toy isle for a while. I have a video of him playing with one that is HILARIOUS!.
My older daughter’s first sentence was “Barbie is evil.” I’m not only proud of that, I’m smug about it.
On the subject of teaching kids funny songs my son (3 3/4) know three so far.
There is Legal Alien by Sting, fairly tame so far.
There is the Flanders and Swann rendition of the laws of thermodynamics as it is a simple principle so why should he not learn the song as well?
Finally there is Sinister Ducks by Sinister Ducks ad any song that puts wearing plaid jackets with horrible shoes on a par with pornography has my votre and any song about ducks has his.
P.S. I always wanted my son’s first insult at school to be Otiose but sadly Poo poo got there first. *sigh*
I just thought this was relevant and enjoyable.
http://xkcd.com/573/