I know this one will age too fast but I couldn’t resist.  You know Neptune is a Spongebob Squarepants fan.  He probably lives in a pineapple these days.

Believe it or not, I researched this strip.  I got all kinds of interesting dirt on Poseidon, whose bizarre sexual history includes raping a woman and then granting her request to be changed into a man so that she could never be raped again…and raping a young boy.  Did the Greeks, of all people, not see the inherent flaw in the woman’s reasoning?

But speaking of violating things, as long as I was violating the rule about topical humor I went all out and broke another rule.  As I could not decide how to explain who Neptune was talking to (and it did not seem to matter much), I actually grabbed separate art of the seahorse and plopped it in, creating a montage.  That’s the dark and dirty secret of this one.  Now I wish to be changed into a real artist so I will never have to fake a drawing again.


A reader writes:

Not at all. The Greeks thought that men having sex with young boys was
normal–thus, boys could be raped. Men having sex with other *men*,
however, was unheard of. Men didn’t allow themselves to be penetrated,
and men (particularly invulnerable warriors like Caeneus turned out to
be) were of course strong enough to fight back any potential rapist.
So Caenis’ reasoning works okay, even if Poseidon was known to rape
boys as well as women. However, I’m not clear on why he’d be so nice
as to offer his victim anything she wanted, after raping her.

who knows too much about Greeks’ sex lives

Ok, it makes a little more sense in context now…but has lost none of the creepiness factor.